Odds and Ends 

Can You Keep Up A Conversation With Your Dad?

This feature requires JavaScript to function. Yes. Absolutely. Check the basement. Check the patio. Go to his office and check there. Hmm. Nope, not here. Check the den. Check his office. You are shocked not to find your dad in the kitchen, a place he can often be found. Check the patio. Check his office. No dads here on the patio. Check the kitchen. Check his office. You walk into your dad’s office building. “Oh, you must be Dad’s kid,” says your dad’s boss, Mrs. Clakswaby. “He’s not here right…

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What Is A Good Gift For My Very Serious Nephew?

This joyless boy’s a mystery to me. Our state-of-the-art quizzes require JavaScript. 1. My nephew is a grave, grim boy who takes weekly oatmeal baths, writes trivia cards for no one, and dreams of designing a superior cigarette. Next week, he turns 12. What do you get a boy like that? A sober boy will go wild for shares of Quest Diagnostics stock. Spoil him rotten with a book of carpet samples. 2. In the past, I’ve bought him monochrome jigsaws, a model kit of the RMS Lusitania, and a…

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4 David Bowie Personas He Created To Get Back On Jury Duty

In 1971, David Bowie sat for jury duty for a vandalism case and had the time of his life. Bowie loved jury duty so much that he spent the rest of his life obsessively creating new personas to get another shot at the jury box. Here are the four unforgettable David Bowie personas that the rock n roll legend created in order to trick the selection committee and get back on jury duty. 1. Ziggy Stardust Upon learning that his recent jury appearance would automatically disqualify David Bowie from selection…

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Making Waves: The Biggest Winner Of NY Fashion Week Was This Shirt That Looks Dressy Enough For A Nice Dinner But Casual Enough For Just Hanging With Buds

The fashion world is abuzz over a groundbreaking new design that critics have unanimously lauded as the biggest winner of New York mens fashion week: a shirt that looks dressy enough for a nice dinner but casual enough for just hanging with buds. Wow! Talk about versatility! From the collection of French designer Maurice Bernard, this solid button-down is appropriate to don at your nieces communion, but not so fancy that your friends will call you Mr. Big Shot for wearing it out to a bar. Ever since its debut…

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These Graphs Perfectly Capture The Rolling Hills And Sprawling Pastures Of Mamas Girlhood, And O! How Sweet The Meadowgrass Smelled

If youve ever wondered what it was like for Mama to grow up tall and strong out on the rolling hills and sprawling pastures of her girlhood, these data visualizations get it across perfectly. Check out this chart, which clearly conveys those endless, boundless hilltops that echoed with laughter, where Mama played and sang, and learned right from wrong, too: Wow. Clearly, the rise and fall of the hillsides matches the beating of her young heart. Its easy to see how Mama would dance atop their peaks, braided pigtails swirling,…

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Odds and Ends 

Your Parents Are Going Out Of Town. Host The Party Of The Year!

This feature requires JavaScript to function. Hell yes. Knowledge is power, and power is everything. BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! screams your clock again, but later now. Does it hate you? Yes. Anyway, probably time to get up, right? Keep hitting snooze. You keep hitting snooze, and eventually, your clock gives up, because humans will always beat machines in the end. You sleep for a long, long time. You dream about gliding over a small island nation ruled by batteries, and about French-kissing your cousin with the two lazy eyes. You manage…

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